I'm Not a Mother, I'm Not a Drug Dealer....

Yesterday, I had an experience that scared me out of my mind. An innocent trip to Fuquay-Varina ended up turning into a rather interesting and thought provoking experience. First of all, Jordan and I had to go to the Sprint store to get a new antenna for her phone because it fell off of her top bunk bed and broke. This was partially my fault, because I was flickering the lights which scared Jordan to the point where she jumped around on her bed, causing her phone to crash to the floor. Point blank, it was broken and had to be fixed immediately....As we waited in the Sprint store, I listened to the conversation that the sales technician was having with a cystomer in the store....about how she was a Christian but she didn't go to church because she was who she was and she didn't want to be judged. This seemed to be a pretty profound statement to share with a strange man that you had never seen before. It made me really sad. To realize that people stray away from our churches because they feel judged and categorized by the members of the church makes me very upset, especially since I know that the only judging should come from God. Jesus died for EVERYONE'S sins, we all sin and fall short of the glory of God and are no better than our neighbor. After that customer left, we walked up to that same lady. She began to tell us about how she had nine cats in her house and they peed all over everything and even threw up on her stove. How disguisting! But then, she said something that really broke my heart. She said that she had to tell her fiancee to choose between her and the cats because they were moving from one trailor park to another and they couldn't go with them. This woman told us that she wasn't sure which her fiancee would pick. Imagine settling for someone who you weren't even sure cared more for you than a cat! I am reading a book right now called "Lady in Waiting" which discusses the call to find God's best for your life, even if it means waiting. I can't being with someone who equivalated (I might have just made up that word) my importance with a CAT. I felt really sorry for this woman....and I don't want to forget the fact that I need to continually do my part to make the church a place where broken people come to be embraced by a community of believers that can help them grow in their faith.
After we left the Sprint store, we went and browsed in some of the downtown shops for a little while. I didn't want to go back to campus...I had been working on Western Civ almost allll day and I was just sick of doing homework...We went back to Jordan's car and began a discussion about what we were gonna do for supper. The cafeteria has been severely lacking this week and we had definitely ruled out the cafeteria. We were just sitting there trying to decide between Ruby Tuesday's or the cheaper way out of going to the Oasis at school where we could just use our declining balance without having to spend any paper money. All of a sudden, a woman came up to the car and tapped on the window. Red flag---I got soooo scared all because I didn't know what this woman wanted from us. Immediately, I just knew that I was going to die or be injured or robbed or something. Both of our pocketbooks were sitting in our laps. I told Jordan that she WAS going to rob us. For some random reason, Jordan's alarm system on her car went off at that moment and no matter how hard she tried it would not stop. She told me that in order for it to stop she was going to have to unlock the door. That suspicious woman was standing on MY side of the car and so I was very reluctant for her to do that, but she did. The whole time the woman stood there and waited for this ordeal to be over. If it was me, I would have cleared the place. I wanted us to drive off and not acknowledge the woman but Jordan cracked my window a little bit and we listened as she said Now girls, I'm not a mother (or maybe mugger) and I'm not a drug dealer. I'm just behind on my week's rent and any money that you have I would appreciate. I wasn't going to give her a dime (isn't that terrible!) because I was scared that if I went into my wallet, she would reach through the window and take my wallet. Jordan gave her a dollar and then we left. I finally breathed a sign of relief, but then I felt convicted almost immediately. Although I believe that the woman was lying, especially because she couldn't even look at us and her story didn't make much sense, I shouldn't have felt the attitude toward her that I did. Is that what Jesus would have done? Not a chance. I also was angry that some people that aren't really in need make me judgmental and unwilling to discern from the people that really do need help. I could go on forever but I am SICK of writing....

Imagination.....

When I was a little girl, my imagination went wild. I had an entire score of imaginary friends and I entertained my family and neighbors and friends with stories of Crystal Dee and Windsock and Windhouse and many more. Crystal Dee even died once in a housefire and came back to life. Wow, I definitely had a very active imagination. However, once I began school my imagination kinda just went down the drain. Throughout grade school (wow, I just sounded like my grandma) I tended to be somewhat envious of people that were creative and could come up with stuff off the top of their heads that just sounded fun. I am proud to say that I think that my imagination is coming back now that I go to college in a town that has one stop light. There is pretty much nothing to do at Campbell, especially on the weekends (which I experienced firsthand this past weekend--it was my first weekend ever staying here). Pretty much, I was bored out of my mind by Friday night.. I had begun to suggest stuff to my roomie to do--stuff that I would have never thought of before coming to college. Saturday, we took pictures running and jumping off the fountain and taking a picture as we were suspended in mid-air. OR how about the homemade facials I suggested. She made hers out of milk of magnesia....The look that I got from some other people when I grabbed a bottle of it at Walmart was priceless. OR how about the pumpkins that we bought and painted....I know I sound crazy, but I am easily having as much fun as I have ever had in my whole life here.
I was wondering what in the world brought back this "revival" of my imagination. I think its because I have once again started to appreciate the small things in life. Toward the end of my high school career, I was bored and angry and tired of everything around me. I was tired of getting up every morning at 6, then going to school all day, then going to work til 6, then doing loads of homework and being too tired and stressed to do anything else besides fall asleep. I was concerned with making good grades, and stressed because calculus was kicking my BUTT. I was tired of the same ole same ole stuff. I was tired of being in school for seven hours a day. But now, I'm in class for 16.5 hours a week, and although sometimes I DO get stressed and I DO just want to hit the snooze button instead of getting up and listening to an 8AM lecture about the French Revolution I am typically much happier with life than I was a few months ago. So, since there isn't much to do here, I have found more time to spend in prayer and reading my bible and laughing and coming up with outrageous things to do instead of sitting around griping and complaining about the routine schedule and moods that I was experiencing.
God is so good! He amazes me every day! Oh, and another thing. Now I appreciate church even more than I ever have before in my life. I'll admit that I was getting annoyed with feeling like I "had" to go to church...not that my parents forced me but still. Now, Zebulon Baptist Church is probably what I look forward to the most on the weekends. The fact that I don't have to go but there's not a place in the world I would rather be makes me really happy... . Goodness, I ramble on and on here............but the point is.....

I definitely made an excellent choice when I decided on Campbell University and God is at work in my life:)

An Update on Life....

This week and last week have been pretty busy- full of cramming for exams and all that fun stuff that comes with college. I had a Western Civ exam today and I think I did alright....I should have studied more, but whatever. Last night Jordan and I laughed so much.....We procrastinated on studying and sang Jesus Paid it All ten times before we finally found a version that we sounded halfway decent on, not one that had been plagued with a coughing spell like half of them were or me busting into laughter like usual. So, that was fun. Last week we painted pumpkins, which turned out to be a hilarious way to entertain ourselves on a boring afternoon! Tonight, my three hour English class was cancelled. I swear, when that happens it is like Christmas in my heart. Especially since it has happened two weeks in a row. My teacher is sick. Anyway, I don't feel too great today, my throat has been hurting pretty bad..Also, I'm staying at CU this weekend for the first time ever to study for my three midterms that I am responsible for next week. I'm kinda excited though and will definitely be making my rounds at Sunni Skies!
In CUW this week, Dr. Codgill spoke about finding God's call for your life. It was inspirational to me in a sense, but also discouraging in the fact that I still have no idea where my life is going. Discovering what His will for me is continues to be a struggle for me. Oh well, it's motivation to spend more time in prayer with Him about it and various other things as well.
Well, I'm off to dinner and then CRU...Maybe I'll update again soon.

My First Post!

Let me just start off by saying that I am very excited about starting this blog. I really hope that I keep it up...but I know how life is fast-paced and it's sometimes difficult to make yourself sit down and write when there are a million other things that need to be done that seem more important. Writing is a very important tool though, and I think that it can cause you to sit down and pour your heart out or sometimes just pause and reflect on your day or week. So we'll see if I can make time for this blog!

I had one of those weeks that you wish would just skip to Friday when it's still Tuesday. I had a huge Chemistry test that loomed over my head all week. I studied forever for it, and still bombed it. This might not seem like a big deal, but in high school I never made the grades that I have in college. I know its just a fact of life, but it definitely takes some getting used to. I felt convicted all week because I reflect back to the "sermon" that Peedie gave the other week on Deacon Sunday about how we should live for today, not dwell in the past or long for the future because the future is in God's hands. That simple, but appropriate message was really just what I needed to hear. I know that God protects me and watches over me. He has a plan for my life that is greater than what I can even imagine. I just wish that sometimes that plan was more easily apparent. I really try to remember that, but sometimes it's hard not to dream for a better tomorrow when your day is not wonderful in the least.

Well, I'm going to stop here-I could go on forever but I need to get ready...I think I'm gonna hang out with some friends today! :)